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Dirtbag Puccini

Dirtbag Puccini

"More like Nessun Whore-ma."

Olivia Giovetti
Mar 03, 2025
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Critical Drift
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Dirtbag Puccini
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Dirtbag Puccini

Can anything on god’s green Internet ever match the naughty delights of Daniel Lavery’s Dirtbag series for The Toast? I seriously doubt it.

In the spirit of both having the occasional nice thing and good artists stealing, here is the first of what I hope can be a semi-occasional series of dirtbag music history.

FRIEND: hey, so i noticed

in your operas, all the women—

PUCCINI: [takes a long audible drag off his cigarette, does not make eye contact]

FRIEND: …die tragically?

PUCCINI: oh wow

do they

that’s crazy

FRIEND: really seems like a pattern

PUCCINI [texting mistress]: no idea what ur talking about

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